


Sticks and Stones

by Notabeautifullittlefool



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-17
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-21 05:00:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17037104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Notabeautifullittlefool/pseuds/Notabeautifullittlefool
Summary: Sara didn’t know how they got here.She didn’t know how they got here, and she didn’t know how they could ever get back.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So in my crazy long drive the other day, this idea popped into my head. I swear it’s going to end happy, but i couldn’t stop thinking about this. 
> 
> Big shout out to superstitious18 for letting me bounce my idea off her and giving me great feedback!

Sara didn’t know how they got here.

She knew how they disagreed, how they were both so stubborn that disagreements sometimes turned into fights. She knew all that. What she didn’t know was how they got _here_ - standing on opposite sides of Ava’s room, screaming and hurling insults at each other. She didn’t know how they got here, and she wasn’t sure how they could ever come back.

 

 

 

Sara was curled into Ava’s side on one of their rare days off as the two of them watched one of the new releases on Netflix. Sara wasn’t paying much attention to the movie; she had felt herself drifting off more than once, safe and comfortable against her love.

Sara’s phone rang, startling them out of the reverie they were in. She looked at the ID and then sheepishly up at Ava. “It’s Gideon. I made the team promise not to call unless it was an unavoidable emergency.”

 

Ava smiled softly at Sara. Their jobs demanded they were able to be reached at any time, and she knew Sara felt bad about potentially disturbing their time together. She paused the movie. “Then i guess you’d better answer it, babe,” she replied.

 

Sara looked at her gratefully as she swiped at her phone to answer the incoming call, but she settled more firmly into Ava, reluctant to let this call disturb her time with her girlfriend. “Hey Gideon, what’s the emergency this time?”

 

 

 

 

Sara finished up her call with Gideon and sighed, dropping her phone into her lap rather dramatically. Ava laughed.

“Apparently there’s a fugitive on the loose in medieval Scotland. A vampire, no less.” Sara rolled her eyes. “But, we have a time ship so i really don’t see why this couldn’t have waited until tomorrow.” She knew that it had to be dealt with quickly or the timeline would begin to solidify. But it didn’t mean she couldn’t be a little petty about it interrupting her day off.

Ava smiled sadly. She and Sara really could have done with a day off with as much as they’d been doing lately. But it would have to wait until tomorrow instead.

“I know, babe. It means i have to head into the Bureau, too. But hopefully it’ll be a quick one this time.” Ava began to disentangle their legs from the blanket wrapped around them in an effort to stand up.

 

“Noooo, don’t get up. Getting up means going to work, and that means no time with you,” Sara whined. She took the hand Ava held out to her and got to her feet. “Besides, Gideon was telling me that the Legends already have an idea. It was actually pretty good too, so maybe we just let the troops handle this one?” Sara knew it was a long shot, and when Ava told her absolutely not she secretly agreed that it would be a disaster to let everyone loose on the timeline without either of them to supervise.

 

“So what’s this big plan that you’re already considering?” Ava asked as they quickly changed into work appropriate clothes. Sweatpants and pajamas just weren’t going to cut it for anything other than the lazy they had planned.

 

“Im going to go undercover in the village. Once the team figures out who in town he is, I’ll flirt a little and get him to try and attack me. Then a nice Buffy-style takedown and a stake for dinner!” She smiled at her own corny joke, waiting for Ava to groan at the pun.

 

Instead, Ava just stood there, silent, mouth open as she stared at Sara. Moments passed, and Ava didn’t say a word or move at all. Finally she seemed to have processed what Sara had said, and Sara almost wished they could go back to a moment before when she hadn’t yet.

 

“You’re doing _what?!_ ” Ava was in complete disbelief. She knew the legends had come up with foolhardy and even downright stupid plans, but this. This was something else.

 

“You mean to tell me you’re going undercover alone, with none of your team there for backup, to hunt down a homicidal, women-hunting VAMPIRE?!”

 

“Well when you say it like that, it sounds like a way worse plan than it is,” Sara grumbled. “Besides, i can more than take care of myself. Former assassin, remember?” Sara smirked at Ava and raised her eyebrow as she gestured to herself.

 

“Sara this is reckless and dangerous and just a horrible idea! How did Gideon ever think it was a good plan?!” Ava’s voice was louder now, toeing the line between speaking and yelling. Why couldn’t Sara understand how needlessly dangerous this was? “The bureau can deal with this much more efficiently and far less dangerously. The legends aren’t doing it.” Ava’s voice was clear; this was her final decision on the subject and Sara wouldn’t be able to change her mind.

 

Sara paused, her jacket still in her hands. “What?” Her voice was quiet, disbelieving, as she looked at her girlfriend across the room. “You can’t tell us what missions we do and don’t take, Ava. We don’t work for you, not really. We’re more like freelance contractors, we choose what we take on.”

 

Ava stared at Sara. “You can’t seriously think I’m letting you take on this fugitive, especially not with that ridiculous plan?”

 

“You’re not going to _let_ us? Do you hear yourself? You don’t get to tell my team what we do or don’t take on!” Sara was yelling, her anger and frustration rolling off her in waves. “Why are you so against this? Do you reallly think i cant hold my own against any of these fugitives??”

 

“You know that’s not the case, Sara! I know you’re more than capable! But it’s not a thought through plan! There are better ways to handle this that don’t have the risk this plan does!”

 

“God, Ava, why can’t you just be supportive of my team?! Offer to be on standby with Bureau backup? Or even to go with me?” Sara shouted. She knew that Ava had a point about their plan not being fleshed out, but they weren’t going to just charge into Medieval Scotland! They would strategize on the ship and figure out how to proceed. Why was Ava so determined to only see the negative?!

 

“Well maybe you could try looking at things from my perspective for a change, Sara, instead of just running off with the legends headfirst into danger!” Ava retorted. She was sick of this. Sara was being childish. If she would just look at things her way-

 

“Why? Not like you’ve ever bothered to see things from mine!”

 

Ava was done. That comment broke the last flimsy string of her self control, and she didn’t even think as she screamed at Sara. “God, Sara, you’re being ridiculous! What’s the point if you won’t even consider the opposite point of view?! You can’t handle when anyone disagrees with you! You know, maybe you should just take me back to 2213 and swap me for a different model! One that won’t argue with you. Just get a fucking sycophantic sex doll, since that’s all you seem to want me to be!”

 

Ava’s blood was like ice in her veins. As soon as the sentence left her mouth, she regretted it. She wanted to grab the words out of the air and shove them back in her mouth, but it was far too late for that.

 

Sara had visibly flinched at Ava’s words, recoiling like they’d struck a physical blow. Then, she was blank. Her face became a mask- emotionless, indecipherable- and she didn’t meet Ava’s gaze.

 

“Sara, i-“ Ava took a small step forward, reaching out for Sara, but Sara stepped back away from her. Ava felt her heart break, the pain filling her chest and overwhelming her senses.

 

Sara stood completely still, and then her hand twitched toward the time courier at her wrist. Ava felt sick.

 

A portal opened into Sara’s room on the Waverider, and she stepped through without even a glance at Ava, closing it as soon as she was on the ship. Ava watched in despair as Sara left without a word, and she collapsed onto the floor as soon as she was gone. _What had she done?!_

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again! I got this chapter written faster than i expected, so yay for unexpected updates! I typed this on my phone in the middle of the night when i could sleep, so apologies for the grammar and spelling mistakes, and for the OOC-ness of the story. 
> 
> But even with all that, i hope you’re still enjoying it. Your comments on the last chapter were so encouraging :)

Ava stared at the place Sara had stood just seconds before, unable to understand what had just happened. She quickly came back to herself and ran for her time courier.

 

As soon as she had it in hand she opened a portal to the waverider. Or, she intended to. She pressed the proper buttons, but no portal appeared. Ava tried again. Still, nothing appeared. She started to panic- how could she fix this if she couldn’t even get to Sara?!

 

Ava paced around the room, clutching her time courier in her hand, stopping every few minutes to try it again. After nearly half an hour, Ava was in tears. She just ruined the best thing in her life because she let her fear and insecurities drive her, and now they were right. She’d lost Sara.

 

Ava’s phone rang, jerking her out of her thoughts as she scrambled to answer it.

 

“Sara?!”

 

A slight pause on the other end of the line, and then Ava’s stomach felt sick.

 

“No, Director Sharpe, Captain Lance does not wish to speak at the moment. I am calling to inform you that your time courier will not work to open a portal onto this ship until further notice.”

 

It wasn’t a malfunction. Sara had deliberately blocked her from portalling onto the Waverider to come after her. Ava thought she might throw up. And she was back to “Director sharpe” with Gideon now?

 

“Please, Gideon, i have to know if she’s okay. I need to talk to her, to see her. Please,” Ava’s voice cracked in the last word. She tried to hold back tears, but they were now streaming down her face.

 

Gideon paused, and when she spoke again, her tone was icier than before. “Captain Lance is physically fine. She said she will let you know when you may contact her again. Goodbye, Director Sharpe.”

 

She heard the click on the line as Gideon hung up on her, and Ava broke. She sank to the floor and sobbed, clutching her phone and her time courier to her chest. 

It was all she could manage to send a quick text off to Gary letting him know she wouldn’t be in until further notice, asking him to handle her meetings and email her anything she could do from home. As soon as she got a response from him, she crawled into bed on Sara’s side and cried herself to sleep, the smell of her girlfriend surrounding her.

 

 

 

 

2 days. It had been two days since Ava had heard from or seen Sara. With their schedule, it wasn’t that unusual for the two of them not to see each other for a few days, but they always touched base with a call or text. Ava felt the absence of communication like a physical hole in her chest. She tried to fill it with the work Gary sent her, but the first document she opened was a mission debrief from one of the Legends latest trips. Ava shut her computer and decided it could wait a while.

 

Mid afternoon on the third day Sara was gone, Ava forced herself to get out of bed and shower. She wouldn’t do any good just wallowing in bed, and a shower might help her clear her mind. It didn’t, but at least she smelled like herself again. She headed downstairs to wallow in the couch with a glass of scotch. Or a bottle. She hadn’t decided yet.

 

She had decided to just go straight for the bottle as she turned the corner and stopped cold.

 

Sara.

 

Curled in on her self on the couch was Sara. Her arms were wrapped around her legs, which were pulled up against her chest, and her hair was hanging damp against her back. Ava didn’t think she’d ever seen a more beautiful sight.

 

She walked forward silently, afraid that if she spoke, she would wake up from what she feared might be a dream. Still not taking her eyes off Sara, she sat down in a chair across from the sofa, desperate to sit next to her and touch her, but terrified it would send her away.

 

Sara continued to stare at the floor, not acknowledging Ava’s presence for several minutes. Ava was in agony. It felt like hours before she finally heard Sara whisper, “i can’t sleep.

 

“Without you, i mean. I can’t sleep without you anymore, and i hate that. When did i become the kind of person who can’t sleep alone?”

 

Sara paused, trying to organize the cacophony of thoughts in her head, and chanced a look up at Ava, who’s face was covered in tears as she watched Sara. Her heart wrenched at the site, and the tears she had held back started running down her cheeks.

 

Sara shook her head to clear her vision and stood up, walking away from Ava.

 

“Don’t! Please, don’t,” Ava called out. She could handle watching Sara leave again, not now, not when she hadn’t even apologized.

 

Sara stopped, turning her head over her shoulder to respond to Ava. “I’m going to the kitchen. Im not leaving. Not right now.”

 

 

Ava paced across the living room floor for the entire ten minutes Sara was gone, letting out a sigh of relief when she saw Sara come back into the room. She set two glasses of whiskey down on the table and placed the bottle between them, pouring a generous amount into each glass.

 

Ava walked over and picked up her glass. She turned to go back to the chair she was sitting in before, but instead she stopped.

 

“Can I- that is would it be okay- can i sit here with you?” Ava asked hesitantly. She was afraid to look at Sara for an answer so she kept facing away from the couch.

 

Silence. Ava felt a pain in her chest and slowly moved to retake her seat when she heard Sara.

 

“Yes.” It was barely more than a whisper, but Ava heard her as clearly as if she shouted it. Some, not nearly enough, of the weight on her heart lifted. Maybe she could fix this. Maybe she could keep from losing Sara. Maybe there was still hope.

 

Ava took a seat on the couch, leaving a few inches of space between them. It felt like miles, like a no mans land that could never be crossed. Those measly few inches suddenly seemed like the most insurmountable of obstacles Ava had ever faced.

 

“Sara,” Ava began hesitantly. “I’m so sorry. I fucked up, badly. And i know this will never make up for it, but god, Sara I’m so sorry. I wish i could go back and make sure it never happened, that i never hurt you like that. It’s unforgivable. I just needed you to know how much i regret it.”

 

Sara was quiet for a minute, processing everything she just heard. When she spoke, it was with a clearer, and louder, voice than she’s managed all day.

 

“I know you are. But baby, that you think i would- that i could- do something like that. That losing you wouldn’t absolutely shatter me. It hurts, Ava. If something ever happened to you, that’s it for me. Seeing someone else with your face, hearing your voice come from someone who isn’t you? Someone who doesn’t have your feelings or your heart? It would break me. I really don’t know if i couldn’t handle it.” Sad stopped for a moment to take a deep drink from her glass. “They May look like you, Ava, but they’re not you. I love you. Your heart, your soul. That’s what makes you so special. And to have you think that i could-“ Sara’s voice was thick with emotion, and she stopped talking, afraid she would cry again. Hearing those words from Ava felt like a knife directly to her heart, and reliving them, something she’d been doing almost nonstop, brought those feelings up again.

 

Ava wiped at her cheeks. She didn’t know just how badly she’d hurt Sara, and hearing it made her sick with the realization of what she’d caused Sara to think.

 

“I don’t think that of you.” Sara jerked her head and looked directly at Ava for the first time since she came back.

 

“You don’t?” Sara was confused and skeptical, but she felt hope flare in her chest, a tiny ember that needing the encouragement to grow into a flame.

 

“No!” Ava was adamant. If nothing else, she was determined to make sure Sara believed her on this. “Of course not. I- sometimes when we fight, or the board at the bureau disagrees with my decisions, i have the uncontrollable fear that one day I’ll wake up and you- or they- will havr traded me for a new AVA. One that doesnt argue or simply does what shes told. Amd i know it’s mostly irrational, but it terrifies me,” Ava spoke in a rush; if she didn’t get it all out now, she may not have another chance. She looked up, meeting Sara’s eyes, and she was astonished at what she saw. Sara was crying, and looking at her like she might break- her hand was stretched out toward Ava, but it was frozen in midair.

 

When their eyes met, the last of Sara’s resistance crumbled away. She quickly grabbed Ava’s hand and laced their fingers together. Ava nearly choked on her whiskey in her surprise. This was already so much more than she hoped for. Just touching Sara again seemed to have a calming effect on them both: they sighed in relief and moved closer to each other without realizing, until suddenly their thighs were pressed against one another,and there was no space left at all.

 

“I hurt you. Im sorry for that,” Ava whispered. She didn’t care how much she had to apologize, Sara had to know how deeply she regretted it.

 

“I know, baby,” Sara replied. “From now on, we have to be able to talk openly and honestly with each other. Giving into fears and anxieties is what broke us last time.” Ava nodded, and Sara held out her pinky. “Pinky promise?”

 

Ava held hers up and linked them together. “Pinky promise.”

 

Sara smiled and leaned into Ava. “Good. We can talk more in the morning, but for now, I’m exhausted. I haven’t slept properly in 3 days. Could we just...could we go to bed?”

 

Ava kissed the top of Sara’s head. “That sounds perfect.”

 

 

 

The two blondes climbed into bed and paused on their respective sides, feeling awkward and unsure of what to do next. Finally, Sara moved towards Ava and shyly asked, “Aves, would you... i mean if it’s okay could you hold me? Just until i fall asleep, i just can’t sleep without feeling you nearby. You don’t have to-“

 

Ava interrupted Sara’s ramblings by wrapping her arms around the shorter woman and pulling her snug against her chest. “I was so worried you wouldn’t want me to. I wanted to let you make the first move- i thought that maybe this might be too much, too soon.”

 

Sara sighed and settled comfortably against Ava’s chest, pressing a gentle, barely there kiss to Ava’s collarbone. “Always want you to hold me.” Her words began to slur as she quickly fell asleep in Ava’s arms. “Feel safe in your arms.” Her sentence died off as she gave in and went to sleep.

 

Ava kisses the top of Sara’s head again and thanked the universe for giving her a chance to make this right as she quickly drifted off.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This adds almost nothing to the plot, it was just an excuse for me to try writing smut for the first time. So if you decide to skip it, you’re not missing anything storywise

The days following their reconciliation had been strained. Neither one wanted to do or say something to upset the other, and as a result they both felt like they were walking on eggshells. Their conversations were polite and they markedly avoided discussing their fight.

 

The only thing that felt normal was when they went to bed. Sara immediately made her way into Ava’s embrace and they both slept like that, tangled up in each other, seeking and accepting the warmth and closeness they couldn’t bring themselves to ask for during the day but both so desperately wanted.

 

Sara slowly woke up and blinked at the bright sunlight streaming in the window. She had forgotten to close the curtains before going to sleep, and she regretted not getting back up to close them when she realized. Other than the sun in her eyes, Sara felt warm, content, safe, but something was different. She was wrapped up in Ava’s arms, her favorite place to be. She started to stretch a little when she noticed what it was. Ava’s hand was cupping her breast under her shirt.

 

Sara stopped moving instantly, worried Ava would wake up. When she was satisfied she hadn’t woken her, Sara relaxed back against Ava, bringing her hand up to cover her girlfriend’s, lightly rubbing her thumb over the knuckles.

 

Sara felt the moment Ava awoke- she nuzzled a little more into Sara’s neck and then as she realized where her hand ended up, she stiffened, immediately starting to pull her hand away without disturbing Sara.

 

Sara tightened her grip on Ava’s hand, keeping her where she was. “You don’t have to move,” she whispered.

 

Ava stilled. She stayed where she was, too afraid to do anything else.

 

Sara continued. “I’ve missed this. I know it hasn’t been that long, not really. But it feels like ages since you’ve touched me like this, since I’ve gotten to touch you. We both apologized, and now i just want us to get back to being us.”

 

Ava’s breath hitched at Sara’s words, and rather than replying she started softly kissing the side of Sara’s neck, under her jaw, and down to her shoulder. The kisses were sweet and soft, and Sara melted under Ava’s attention. She quickly rolled over so they were face to face.

 

Sara leaned in and placed a chaste kiss against Ava’s lips, leaning back to check her reaction. Ava’s eyes had fluttered closed and she let out a sigh at Sara’s soft touch. She had missed kissing Sara more than she realized. She chased after Sara’s lips, smiling against them when she caught her.

 

Ava’s hand wound up on the small of her back, and she used her new position to immediately pull Sara in closer against her. Sara nipped at Ava’s bottom lip, soothing the slight sting with her tongue. Ava opened her mouth at the feeling, and Sara slipped her tongue past their lips. Ava moaned, feeling Sara’s tongue slide against hers, and Sara brought her hand up to tangle in Ava’s hair, moving her head slightly to give her access to Ava’s neck. She placed open mouthed kisses down the side to her collarbone, where she bit and sucked to leave the beginnings of a small purple bruise.

 

Ava’s other hand was in Sara’s hair, holding her against her neck as she found a sensitive spot on the underside of Ava’s jaw, which she proceeded to lick and kiss until Ava started squirming, desperate for more contact, more friction, just more.

 

Sara pulled back and beamed when she saw how dark Ava’s eyes were with want.

 

Ava whined at the sudden loss of Sara’s lips against her skin. “Sara,” she breathed. “Please, baby.”

 

She sat up and, before Ava could react, swing her leg over Ava’s hips to straddle her.

 

Sara leaned down and pressed a long, soft kiss against Ava’s lips. “Mmm, patience, baby. I’m gonna make you feel so good. I want to show you just how very much i love you, Aves.” She punctuated her words with soft kisses to Ava’s cheeks, nose, and forehead. “Can i do that?”

 

Ava stared, breathless, up at Sara and nodded. “Please,” she whispered.

 

Sara smirked. Painstakingly slowly, she popped the button open, keeping her eyes locked on Ava’s the whole time. She continued with her excruciating pace, and by the time she popped open the fourth button, Ava was getting desperate. She was biting her lip as she tried to keep from moving, but Sara noticed. She leaned down to place a kiss between Ava’s breasts and took pity on her, undoing the rest of the top before she’d even sat up.

 

Sara took in the sight of Ava, topless and impatient underneath her. Ava never failed to take her breath away, and even after all this time Sara was still caught off guard by how beautiful she was.

 

She gently traced her finger from her collarbone, down between her breasts, and over her abs, smiling at the way Ava wriggled beneath her, impatient and waiting.

 

“No more teasing, love. I can’t take it.”

 

“No more teasing,” Sara promised.

 

She quickly pulled Ava’s pants and underwear off, tapping her hips so she would lift them slightly, and ducked her head to Ava’s nipple, palming the other.

 

Ava’s eyes slammed shut and she threw her head back, the sudden sensations nearly overwhelming after all Sara’s teasing.

 

Sara pulled back with a wet pop, and kissed Ava as her fingers traced their way down between her legs.

 

“What do you want, baby?” Sara whispered against Ava’s mouth.

 

“Fingers,” Ava panted. Her head was swimming with the feeling of Sara in and around her, and she couldn’t think straight enough for sentences.

 

Sara moved further down her body until she was in-between Ava’s thighs. She ran her fingers through to check how ready Ava was, and she groaned low and deep when she felt how wet Ava was for her.

 

She looked at Ava, waiting for her permission before she continued. Ava met her eyes and gave an almost imperceptible nod and Sara slid two fingers in, her gaze not leaving Ava for a second as she slowly start to pull out, twisting her fingers, and back in. Ava was so worked up from Sara’s earlier teasing she couldn’t last long, even at this rate.

 

Sara kisses Ava’s neck and the sharp sting of teeth sliding over her skin followed by Sara’s tongue soothing the sting was all that it took to push Ava over the edge.

 

Sara pulled her fingers out, wiping them on the sheets, and crawled back up the bed. She laid down on her back and Ava immediately curled up against her chest. Sara kissed the top of her head, gently pushing a few strands of hair out of Ava’s face.

 

“I love you, Aves, and i never want you to doubt or forget that. You’re the only one i want. You’re my love, and i can’t bear the thought of being without you.” Sara spoke quietly, as if her volume might break the calm and loving atmosphere.

 

Ava lifted her head and looked up at Sara. “I know, my love. I love you too.” She placed a sweet kiss against Sara’s lips and curled back against her side. And as soon as she could remember how to breathe again, she planned to show Sara just how much.


End file.
